What to do following the death of a loved one

Losing a loved one is a challenging reality to come to terms with. Bereavement is the grief and mourning experience following the death of someone important to you. While it’s an inevitable part of life, something that virtually all of us go through at some point, losing someone you love can be one of the most painful experiences you’ll ever have to endure.

Whether it’s a close friend, spouse, partner, parent, child, or other relative, the death of a loved one can feel overwhelming. You may experience waves of intense and very difficult emotions, ranging from profound sadness, emptiness, and despair to shock, numbness, guilt, or regret. You might rage at the circumstances of your loved one’s death—your anger focused on yourself, doctors, other loved ones, or God. You may even find it difficult to accept the person is really gone, or struggle to see how you can ever recover and move on from your loss.

We have more information at the bottom of this page to support with the bereavement process.

Registering the death

The registration of the death is the formal record of the death. It’s done by the Registrar of Births, Deaths and Marriages. It’s a criminal offence not to register a death.

You can find out how to register a death in the UK or abroad on GOV.UK. You’ll be told who can register the death, what they need to do and what documents they’ll need.

Medical Examiners Office Referral

As a summary, the Medical Examiner (ME) system provides a process of scrutiny for all deaths that are not reported directly to the Coroner. The intended plan has been to introduce the same system for all deaths, again, except those that are reported directly to the Coroner, that occur in the community, which includes both General Practice and hospice.

The common purpose of the Medical Examiner system is:

• To create safeguards by ensuring a proper scrutiny of all non-coronial deaths

•  To support and engage the bereaved and provide an opportunity for them to discuss any concerns or questions they may have about the care of the deceased, or the process being followed after death, with a doctor who is not involved in that person’s care

• To improve the quality of death certification and

• Thereby, improve the quality of mortality data

• We aim to complete the MCCD within 5 days

 

When a coroner is needed

Anyone who is unhappy about the cause of a death can inform a coroner about it, but in most cases a death will be reported to a coroner by a Medical Examiner or the police.

A death must always be reported to a coroner in the following situations:

  • the person’s doctor had not seen them in the 28 days before they died or immediately afterwards

  • a doctor had not looked after, seen or treated the person during their last illness (in other words, death was sudden)

  • the cause of death is unknown or uncertain

  • the death was violent or unnatural (for example, suicide, accident or drug or alcohol overdose)

  • the death was in any way suspicious

  • the death took place during surgery or recovery from an anaesthetic

  • the death took place in prison or police custody

  • the death was caused by an industrial disease.

Click the link below for more information regarding the coroner,

More information

For more information about post-mortems and your rights to know what happens with organs and tissue, go to the Human Tissue Authority website at www.hta.gov.uk.

Inquests

An inquest is a legal inquiry into a death. Only a coroner can order an inquest and relatives have no right to insist on one.

It is held in public (sometimes with a jury) by a coroner where the death was violent or unnatural or took place in prison or police custody or where the cause of death is still uncertain after a post-mortem. 

An inquest may take place into a death which took place abroad if the body has been returned to the UK.

Relatives may attend an inquest and ask questions of witnesses. Legal aid may be available for legal advice on inquests. An organisation called INQUEST may sometimes be able to arrange legal representation, either free or for a reduced charge.

Where did the death occur

Deaths in hospital

Most deaths now take place in a hospital or nursing home. If your relative dies in hospital, staff will contact you, lay out the body and arrange for it to be taken to the hospital mortuary. You will then be asked to arrange for the body to be collected by funeral directors, who will normally take it to their chapel of rest. At the same time, you will be asked to collect the person’s personal possessions.

Before a death can be formally registered, a doctor will need to issue a medical certificate giving the cause of death. In hospital, this is usually done by a hospital doctor, who will hand the certificate to you in a sealed envelope addressed to the Registrar of Births, Deaths and Marriages. You will also be given a notice, explaining how to register the death. There is no charge for either of these. If the person has not been seen by a hospital doctor, their GP may be able to issue a certificate instead.

A hospital may ask you for permission to carry out a post-mortem examination to learn more about the cause of death. You do not have to agree to this.

Deaths at home

When someone dies at home, their GP should be called as soon as possible. The GP will normally visit the house and, if the death was expected, should be able to issue a certificate giving the cause of death.

If you do not know the name of the GP, the person didn’t have a GP, or if the death happens outside normal GP practice opening hours, call 111 (the NHS non-emergency number) instead.

A doctor is not allowed to issue a certificate if they are unsure about the cause of death. When this happens the death must be reported to a coroner and the body will be taken to a hospital mortuary, where a post mortem may need to take place.

Deaths abroad

If a death takes place abroad it must be registered according to the law of that country. The death should also be reported to the British Consul who may be able to arrange for the death to be registered in the UK as well.

Returning a body to the UK is expensive but the cost may be covered by any travel insurance taken out by the person. If the death was on a package holiday the tour operator should be able to help with arrangements.

When a body is returned to the UK, the Registrar of Births, Deaths and Marriages for the district where the funeral is to take place must be told and will need to issue a certificate before burial can take place. If cremation is to take place the Home Office also needs to give permission.

If the death was not due to natural causes the coroner for the district will also need to be told and an inquest may need to take place. 

Donation of organs for transplant or the body for medical research

Donation of organs

The person who died may have wanted to donate organs for transplant. This will be easier if they were on the NHS Organ Donor Register, carried a donor card and had discussed the donation plans with their family. Relatives will still be asked to give their consent before donation. Most organ donations come from people who have died while on a ventilator in a hospital intensive care unit. For more information about organ donation and transplantation, contact:

NHS Organ Donor Register

Website: www.organdonation.nhs.uk/

Donation of the body for medical education or research

If you wish to leave your body for medical education or research, you must arrange to give consent before you die. You can get a consent form from your nearest medical school. You should keep a copy of the consent form with your will and tell your family, close friends and GP that you wish to donate your body. Go the Human Tissue Authority website to find out your local medical school at www.hta.gov.uk.

You can get further information about body donation from the Human Tissue Authority website at www.hta.gov.uk.

If the body is accepted (and many bodies are not suitable), the medical school will arrange for eventual cremation or burial.

Death Of A Child

If your child died in a hospital or hospice

A doctor will usually give you a certificate giving the cause of death and a notice explaining how to register the death with the Registrar of Births, Deaths and Marriages. The hospital or hospice will take care of them until you have arranged to call a funeral director.

If your child died in a hospital or hospice

Your GP should be called as soon as possible and asked when they can come and examine your child in order to issue the certificate giving the cause of death. You will also need to decide whether you wish your child’s body to be laid out at home or transferred to a funeral parlour. The GP may decide to visit the funeral parlour to issue the certificate.

You will need to register the certificate of death with the Registrar of Births, Deaths and Marriages so you can arrange the funeral and make any practical arrangements.

 

Please click the link below for further information

Click Here

Miscarriages, stillbirths, neonatal and perinatal deaths

Miscarriages

A miscarriage is the loss of a baby before the 24th week of pregnancy. No registration is needed.  But if the baby lives for even a short time after being born, you might need to register the birth and death. For more information, see Neonatal and perinatal deaths.

Stillbirths

A stillbirth is a birth after the 24th week of pregnancy where the child is not born alive. A doctor or midwife will issue a medical certificate of stillbirth, giving the cause.

The parents must present the certificate to the Registrar of Births and Deaths within 42 days of the baby’s delivery. In Scotland, the time limit is 21 days. 

If the parents are married, the registrar will need details of both parents. If the parents are not married, only the details of the mother are required but the father can give his details.

If you’re in a female civil partnership and the child was born by assisted reproduction, the registrar will need details of both partners.

The registrar can issue a death certificate but only to the mother, to the father or mother’s civil partner if their details appear on the registration or to siblings if the parents are deceased.

Many funeral directors make no charge for arranging the funeral of a stillborn baby and many cemeteries and crematoria also make no charge for burial or cremation.

Neonatal and perinatal deaths

If the baby lives for even a short time after being born and then dies, this is called a neonatal or perinatal death.

A neonatal death is where is the baby dies within 28 days of being born, whatever the length of the pregnancy.

A perinatal death is where the baby is born after the 24th week of pregnancy, but dies within 7 days of being born.  

If there is a neonatal or a perinatal death, both the birth and death must be registered. When a baby has died within a month of being born, the birth and death can be registered at the same time.

The birth is registered in the normal way.  The death is registered by taking the medical certificate of death to the Registrar of Births and Deaths within five days of the death (eight days in Scotland).  If this is not possible, the hospital or parent should telephone the registrar and explain the situation, for example, that the mother is too ill to attend.

If the parents are married, the registrar will need details of both parents.  If the parents are not married, only the details of the mother are required but the father can give his details.

If you’re in a female civil partnership and the child was born by assisted reproduction, the registrar will need details of both partners.

The parents may still be able to get benefits like Child Benefit and Child Tax Credit for eight weeks after the death of the baby.

Find out what happens to your Child Benefit when your baby dies on GOV.UK.

Find out what happens to your Child Tax Credit when your baby dies on GOV.UK.

Get more help

St Michaels Hospice

Our Bereavement Support Service offers a call back telephone support service to anyone living in the Hastings and Rother district requiring emotional support related to bereavement and loss.

The call back service is managed Monday to Friday, 9am – 5pm. To request a call back, please either complete the form below or call the Bereavement Service on 01424 456361.

Bereavement Services

Dragonflies

Dragonflies offers free support to children aged 0-18 years old and their families who are experiencing pre or post bereavement

Telephone 01424 423683

https://www.fsncharity.co.uk/projects/dragonflies-bereavement-project

For practical and emotional support, contact:

Cruse Bereavement Care 

Website: www.cruse.org.uk

Hope again (service for young people)

Website: www.rd4u.org.uk

Barnardo’s Child Bereavement Service

The Child Bereavement Service provides individual and group support to children and young people who have been bereaved. There is also an advice line that is open to any adult concerned about a bereaved child. The service is provided mainly for Northern Ireland, but will give telephone or email advice and information to people anywhere in the UK. Contact details are:

Barnardo’s Child Bereavement Service

Website: www.barnardos.org.uk/childbereavementservice.htm

Child Bereavement UK

Child Bereavement UK offers support to families when a child of any age dies or is dying, or when a child is facing bereavement. It runs a support and information helpline and email service staffed by trained bereavement support workers. Child Bereavement UK also provides training in bereavement support to professionals. Contact details are:

Child Bereavement UK

Website: www.childbereavement.org.uk

WAY Widowed And Young

WAY Widowed And Young is a self-help organisation for people aged 50 and under who have been widowed. Their website is: www.widowedandyoung.org.uk.

Support following the death of a child

The Compassionate Friends

Website: www.tcf.org.uk

 

Child Death Helpline

Website: www.childdeathhelpline.org.uk

The Lullaby Trust

Website: www.lullabytrust.org.uk

The Rosie Crane Trust

The Rosie Crane Trust provides support for bereaved parents. They offer a 24-hour ‘Listening Ear Helpline’, available to all in the UK. Their drop-in centres are available in Somerset, North Dorset and North Devon in England.

Website: www.rosiecranetrust.org

Support following the death of a same-sex partner

Switchboard LGBT+ Helpline

Website: www.switchboard.lgbt

Support following a stillbirth

Stillbirth and Neonatal Death Society (SANDS)

Website: sands.org.uk

Support following a miscarriage

Miscarriage Association

Website: www.miscarriageassociation.org.uk

Support following a suicide

Survivors of Bereavement by Suicide

Men’s bereavement helpline: bereaveMENt@uksobs.org

Punjabi Speaking Women’s Group: birmingham@uksobs.org or 07376 303 438

Website: uksobs.org

Requesting Medical Records

Deceased patients retain the right of confidentiality. The process around deceased patients records and the controllership changed on 1st August 2022.

A patient representative such as: The Executors of the Will, or someone with Letters of Administration can request information without giving a reason as to why it is needed.

The practice will require confirmation of your identity and your role. 

Also, anyone with a claim arising from the death of the deceased.  This could be an insurance claim, or a claim regarding the will or the care they received leading up to death.  In which case the requestor must only ask for specific information to support the claim, they cannot have access to the whole record.

If the family have asked for information about the patient’s final illness, It can be shared with the GPs discretion if there is a clear justification. This can be when the family believe that there may have been a misdiagnosis, or negligence.

It is important to note, confidentiality of the records and a patient’s wishes must be maintained after their death. If the patient asked for their records not to be shared with an individual/family, then we cannot release them.

For providing a copy of a deceased patient’s medical records, a fee not exceeding the cost of making the copy and postal costs may be charged.

 

CORONAVIRUS (COVID-19) ADVICE

Do not leave home if you or someone you live with has either a high temperature or a new, continuous cough or loss/change to sense of smell or taste.

Click the links below for more help